Calling all ladies. Yeah, that means you, dollface! As of right about…NOW…Chuck Ivory is a free man! Free to roam the sexy singles scene once again, and roam he shall. Grrrrr…

Check the hair. Check the glasses. Check the lollipop. Now check this: I’m a wildcat on the prowl, and you, my dear, are lookin’ like one savory piece of female flesh to me right about now. Hot stuff! Mee-owww!!

So, if you don’t mind cleaning up after a guy who has little or no control over his bowels, and are longing for the kind of tender touch that will make your toes curl, then don’t walk—run—on over here, pronto. Capice? Just be careful not to slip on my shit.

man